A well worn Bible

I was struggling this morning.

Last night, a late phone conversation, got into my brain, and caused restless sleep. I woke early with the feeling of sand in my eyes and a foggy head.

Some days, more than others, it is more evident our mind and soul need to be renewed…….by the minute…..by the second.

My Spirit knows where to rest though.

In His Word.

I’ve been using my study Bible lately, for morning reading. It is filled with folded papers from sermons and teachings over the past 13+ years.  The margins of this Bible have notes, hearts, exclamation points!

Scripture is underlined and dated, with the Pastor or teacher’s initials, helping my mind recall the message. The date reminds me of what point I was at in my life and how that scripture spoke to me. I am reminded of the grace with which God has gotten me through some things.

And it never ceases to amaze me, how just the right paper or note draws my attention.

Exactly when I need it.

(Thank You God.)

I pulled out a recent exhortation’s notes. Although the message was good then, as I reread it this morning….I realized how GREAT it is!  God’s Word and message is living, timely, and timeless!!!

To look at this bible, you would think it is a mess. HA!  The mess in this bible relates into a message, exactly when the Holy Spirit knows I need it.

(Thank You God.)

And anyone that knows me, knows I am very organized and appreciate order. Normally, as soon as I am done with a list it gets tossed.

Never, ever, ever have I felt “done” with a note when it comes to His Word.

To this day, I love looking at people’s Bibles. I appreciate a flimsy Bible, where the gold edging is worn off from years of being opened.  I’ve even seen Bibles held together by a rubber band!   And when we go to an Estate Sale, I will look through the books for a personal Bible. I see the hand-written notes of how God touches people.

Precious…all so precious.

Examine your Bible. Does it have notes? Do you draw pictures? Are papers sticking out of it? Is the binder breaking and pages ready to fall out? What a beautiful image of your love for the Truth.

And please, please, please, hear my heart……if your Bible is pristine.

Open it up

Read it

Write in the margins

Draw arrows, hearts, and !!!!

Highlight the Words

Read the red letters

Place paper notes in it

I encourage you to fall in love with your Bible. It is a Living journal. And, I promise you…….at just the right time, when you least expect it, you will discover a note or paper.

Right.when.you.need.it.

 

 

 

 

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Faith in humanity restored-the $20 bill

He placed a twenty dollar bill on the table and said, “young man, this is for you. I want to say thank you.”

The six of us looked up at the large, long-haired, tattooed man standing in front of us. He must have noticed our awed look, then clarified:

“He gave up his seat, while we were waiting, for my daughter and grandbaby.”

My son, tried to return the money, explaining it not necessary.

The man insisted,”No, that just doesn’t happen these days. The world needs more of it. I wanted to thank him. That’s for you.” He pointed at the twenty, waved slightly, then walked away.

We were all speechless for a moment.

45 minutes before the exchange, we had all met up at Texas Roadhouse for dinner. My husband and son drove together, and we met up with them. The place was packed!

Apparently, when my guys got there, they requested a table for 6, were given a table buzzer, then sat on the bench near the entry door.

A young woman, with a baby carrier, made her way through the busy restaurant, to wait too. My son seeing the woman standing there, asked if she’d like to sit down. With relief, she accepted. My son stood to wait, and shortly after I arrived with friends.

We never knew this kind gesture happened. Neither my son nor husband mentioned it.

It turned into a rippled blessing.

A simple act of manners, by my son, blessed a young mom.

Her dad witnessed faith in humanity restored and blessed my son monitarily.

All of us at the table were blessed, as this dad sought out our son (in a packed restaurant) to show his gratitude.

Finally, on the way home, as my husband and I were reminiscing about it, we had the last blessing of knowing our adult child is making a difference in this crazy world.

The Bible says:

“Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it ” Proverbs 22:6

Often, while raising young kids, we are just doing everything to survive those years. We hope lessons instilled in them ‘stick’. We hope we are raising them to be independent and productive people. We want them to be world changers.

And sometimes, all it takes is giving up your seat to change the world.

So, with a full heart, this momma gets to write……..it was a privilege tonight to see that blessing unfold.

Years of parenting, neatly wrapped and rewarded, in a 20 dollar bill.

Dandelion word for a friend

The Lord said,

“you may think this is a weed, but it is My creation. My hand is holding it, and My breath is blowing life into the final flower. Each seed is being carried off and being spread and noticed. One beauty will land and turn into the most beautiful, continually growing, final culmination of all you have done for Me.”

The burden that is in your life, God has his hand on it and you.

God is blowing life into each detail of it and it is pushing off to bless and grace somewhere or someone else. It is not ours to worry about, but only to do as He allows. His breath will give life to the seed. Let it travel and land.

One of the seeds will land, take root, and grow into something more magnificent than our hearts, minds, and dreams could believe.

Trust in Him.

(A Word given to a friend in 2016. I had it written for her. I just found it in my blessings box and had to share. I know it’s meant to bless someone else.)

The circle of friends gets smaller

In my 20s I had many friends. We drank a lot together, danced on picnic tables, and had many laughs.

In my 30s I had several friends. Our lives were based around our kids activities and we sat together in bleachers or pews, cheering or worshipping together.

In my 40s I have had fewer friends. With the kids out of school and we’ve joined a very large church, the radius for my circle of friends is narrowing inwards.

Last May, I turned 50. My circle of friends is the size of my wedding band on my left hand. And my best friend is the man that put that ring on my finger. He holds me accountable. He loves me, enjoys me being crazy, dances with me in the kitchen, makes me belly laugh, and knows that sometimes all I need is a hug.

I’ve cried to him that I sometimes miss the younger years of many friends. He listens and reminds me of what today’s friends give me.

Today’s friends allow me to be me. They will listen to a struggle, sypathize or empathize, then give solid advice. They are bold and wise. They bring no drama to the relationship. They have lived enough years now to know how to embrace life and let go of the little things.

I wonder if in the next decades, my circle will get smaller. Perhaps it will…..yet, I have no worry for things lost.

I have:

the youth of my 20s

the nurturing of my 30s

the Spiritual growth of my 40s

And, now, gaining the wisdom and love of it all in my 50s

A circle that is a tight simple hug of love and reminders.

my personal privilege. I am rich!

I live a life of privilege.

Stay with me for a moment.

The dictionary.com definition of privilege is a special right, advantage, or immunity granted or available only to a particular person or group.

Privilege is often attached to wealth or riches.  If that is true, I am privileged.  Yet, not by the wealth or riches the world may think–> money. Instead, I have wealth and riches in my heart that are precious and a monetary amount cannot be claimed.

So, yeah….my privilege is rich.

I am not privileged because of my race, my sex, nor my tax bracket. So, do I misunderstand the meaning of privilege. Not at all.  If I break it down- I have a special advantage over another person or group, that is only available to me BECAUSE I made a personal choice.

My personal choice was to leave my career of 25 years, to do what I always wanted to do. Be a homemaker. I changed my mindset from having to work a full-time job, stressed to the max, and keep the household together, to I get to stay home, keep the household together, and live in peace.

Did you notice the verb change?  The difference of those two verbs is my personal privilege.  My personal choice changed my verb.  Remember a verb is an action word.  It took action to make the change.

My words before were:

“I have to go to work”

“I have to buy groceries”

“I have to clean the bathroom”

“I have to do the laundry”

“I have to……..”

Now I can say:

“I get to go to Bible study”

“I get to buy groceries”

“I get to clean our home”

“I get to do the laundry”

“I get to ……”

In the last 10 months, repeatedly I have been asked (by outsiders) “are you bored yet?”  The answer every time is “No.”  An unpretentious-one-word-happy “no”.  I have said it so often, I began to think is ‘something wrong with me? Am I supposed to be bored?’  I can easily be home for 3,4,5 days straight, never leaving the driveway, and be perfectly content.

I am enjoying my ‘get to’s. I now leave the house to buy groceries and pray before to lighten up someone’s day with conversation or a simple smile. Today, I get to do my hobby of writing. Tomorrow, I get to read for hours, or talk on the phone to a friend. Daily, I get to make my hard working, ever supportive husband a home cooked meal, made with fresh vegetables and healthy, lean food.

Yes, these get’s are all a privilege. Given to me because I made a personal choice. It is a personal choice that does not build up our bank account. Rather it is building up my peace. It is building up my marriage. It is building up others in their time of need.

My privilege is not given to me to be boastful.

My privilege is not for personal gain.

My privilege is not unappreciated.

I take my privilege very seriously, with gratitude, and humbly. I am blessed, beyond measure, and pray the rewards go forward into the lives of others.

What are you counting as your personal privilege?

A flower endures….a poem of hope

Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

Shade crept in uninvited

Stealing the temperature

cold became ordinary

Without knowledge, the floret began to fade

 

The rain still came

The sun whispered

glimpses of hope

The floret, never abandoned

yet lonely

 

Time continues

Raindrops

Sun winks

The pistil sinks downwards

amid its own sorrow

Time continued

 

The rumble was recognized

As the thunder clap shook the ground

The winds swept in change

 

Light replaced the former shadow

Warmth comforted the soil

Unseen roots awakened from slumber

inactivity stretched from the ends

The floret’s stem arched

from desperate posture

 

Grateful,

the floret raised

its face up to the sun

Petals, expressing delight

 

The promised hope, redeemed

Restoration

Edification

Glory

Shone once again.

 

 

 

Finding balance in your life-praying in bullet points

I woke at 5:11 a.m. Ugh…………………

I hoped to fall back to sleep, finally gave up at 6:01, and got up. I sat in my favorite chair and tried to pray. I only had 5 hours sleep and my head hurt. My mind could not focus on the unclear & shambled thoughts in my mind. I laid my head back and tried to pray in the spirit. It helped, but my brain stayed absorbed on my spinning and aching head.

Recently, I have been repeatedly prompted to the posture of praying on your knees. A position of reverence to God’s authority.

“He walked away, about a stone’s throw, and knelt down and prayed.” Luke 22:41.

Slipping down to the floor, I rested my head in my folded arms. Again, I prayed in the spirit, waiting for the whirling thoughts to cease.

Bullet points……. God reminded me of my love for bullet points.

See, my talents are in administration and my career has led me to management. Through God’s design of administration and management, I create agendas, I plan projects, and I favor bullet points to prepare my thoughts.

I felt the small whisper…..Bullet points…..

Also, years ago, I was taught to have proper balance in life. It may have been the most important lesson I ever learned at church. We need order. We live in a chaotic world. So many demands coming at us constantly.

Our God is a God of order (Genesis 1:1-2:4).

Proper balance:
1. GOD– your personal time with Him! (Matthew 11:28)
a. This does not include church.
b. This does not include Bible study
c. This is one to one time with Him
i. Prayer
ii. Worship
iii. Word
2. Spouse– focus on your marriage for a loving relationship. (Genesis 2:24, Ephesians                             5:25)
a. Kiss good morning
b. Kiss good bye-When you leave each other
c. Kiss hello when reunited
d. Say I love you out loud
e. Husbands-be the provider; take authority for your family (1 Timothy 3:4-12)
f. Wives-be the nurturer; strength is evident in a household well taken care of                                    (Titus 2:4-5)
3. Children– no matter what the age. (Ephesians 6:1-5)
a. This is not to say you don’t tend to their needs.
b. By putting your husband 1st, it shows your children what a healthy marriage                                looks like.
c. When spouse comes home, kiss your spouse 1st, then the kids. Kids love                                           knowing their parents love each other.
d. If a spouse is working late and cannot attend a child’s function- use your words                             to celebrate how hard that spouse works for our family! How they provide                           for us! And when the family is back together, share in how great the child                             did at the function and thank the parent for working for the family.
e. Dinner table- use it to reunite the family.
i. Dad at the head-Keep Dad the head of the household
ii. Pray before eating
iii. Family conversations
iv. How???don’t think you have time=kids sports, concerts, etc
1. Re-evaluate the busyness of your life
a. Do the kids really need to be in soccer, ballet, karate, swim                                                          lessons, and etc etc etc
4. Work, fellowship (Genesis 2:15 and Genesis 2:19) (1Thessalonians 5:11)
a. These will just fall into place when you have your #1,2,3 in order
b. If you focus on your work more than your family
i. Family will hate seeing you leave
c. If you focus on hanging with the guys or girls
i. Family will feel left out
ii. Kids will see the sadness on the spouse.
5. Church ministry (James 2:14-17)
a. DO NOT mistake church ministry for your #1
i. Your #1 is intimate time with your FATHER
b. Youth leader, worship team, ushering, maintenance
c. When your 1,2,3,4 fall into place.
i. The family will joyfully want you to do it
ii. The family will joyfully help you
iii. The family will joyfully share in it with you

So, as I prayed, with my head swirling, the Lord reminded me of this order.

I paused and was still for a moment.

“Be still and know I am God” Psalm 46:10

“But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.” Matthew 6:33

Pray in bullet points.  Put the order back in your life.    It’s actually very simple………………………….

I began to pray:

1. Thank You God for reminding me. Thank You God for loving me. Thank You God for always being here for me. Show me God how to do life right.

2. Lord, I lift up to you my marriage. I pray for my husband. His work, his peace, the stresses of his daily life. Show me Lord how to be a better wife. Give me vision into his burdens so I can help him and be yoked with him properly.

3. I pray out for my sons. May my sons understand their mothers love and faith. I prayed for the young women who love them. May they learn to be helpmates.

4. I prayed out for a new job assignment. I prayed for His help in this independent career increase. I prayed against pride. I prayed not to overstep. I then prayed out for my sisters in the church who are edifying me, supporting me, and holding me accountable. I named each by name, saying bless them…bless them… And I prayed out for friends who don’t yet know the Lord…..bless them…bless them.

5. I prayed for church ministry. God knows what is on my heart. I asked in His time to use me. And until then, I asked that He prepares me. Give me time for preparation. A burning desire for it. And to do it with excellence.

I encourage you. The next time you do not know how to pray:

1. Get on your knees
2. Pray the bullet points of the balance in your life
• GOD
                        • SPOUSE
                        • KIDS
                        • WORK & FELLOWSHIP (friends)
                        • CHURCH MINISTRY

Amen

Ironworkers-trades work…a mom’s love for her hard working sons

 

Oldest son ❤

Youngest at training ❤

Neither of my boys enjoyed school.

I’d have parent-teacher conferences and repeatedly teachers would say “a leaf falling outside catches his attention more than I can.” They would say the boys are brilliant because they could score an 83 on a test, yet never turn in a homework assignment.

We knew college was not in their future. They had senioritis by their sophomore year. No way were they going another 4 years.

And you know what……we were totally OK with that!

Our sons are 8 years apart in age. Actually, it was like having two only-childs for many years. Then, because of the age difference, they were always in different activities. “Mom, the babies in my legos.” “Mom, he won’t play with me.” “Mom, tell him to go away so I can hang with my friends.” “Mom, when can I play the video game?”

They both had incredible abilities to take things apart and put them back together. As early as 4 years old, they would unwrench a plastic bike and reassemble it. You could see the wheels turning in their heads, and the pride as they accomplished a task.

The oldest was independent by the time he was 19, and at age 20 started an apprenticeship with the ironworks union. He recently turned 30 and is a foreman on many job sites.

The younger son started out in plumbing, tried as a barber, and then landscaping. At 21 years old, his brother began to encourage him to do the ironworkers apprenticeship. He started taking classes and this is on his first job site. And his brother is his boss.

Society puts so much pressure on going to college. It simply is not for everyone. The world still needs cars to run (mechanics), homes to be built (carpenters, plumbers, electricians), and buildings to be erected (ironworkers).

We could have forced the boys into college. Putting them/us into thousands of dollars of debt, with zero results.

Instead, we let them be them. We let them use their hands and minds to determine how they wanted to do life. Work is work. It’s a four letter word. You have to do it. Especially as a male. You need to provide for you future family.

Do I dare say it??!!!??? It’s OK to not go to college. If you see your child develop with more visual or hands on learning…embrace it! The pressure of going to college is too much for some kids.

When I was in school, and even when the boys were in school, there was/are off campus trades opportunities for students-BOCES. Sadly, the kids that got on the bus to go to BOCES were thought of as the rejects. The ‘going no-wheres’ kids. Many of those kids are now contractors, beauticians, and mechanics.

BOCES also offers adult education. It’s for people who tried a job and are looking for a new career. As an adult learner…..get this!!….you have to PAY for the education. I know SEVERAL who went back to BOCES, paid for classes for certification or licensure, and are now doing very well.

The horrible stigma of alternative learning must change. Students should be encouraged to explore hands on learning. Class room settings that focus, not only on math, science, reading, but also a trade that we all need for day-to-day operations. Instead of being looked at with shame, these students should be applauded for our future!

A recent text from my oldest-“yeah your boys will be set with how early they got in the business”. And they truly will. They are living within their means, and making excellent earnings for their hard work. To say this momma is proud, is an understatement. Was it a knuckle biter while they were in school? ABSOLUTELY! Yet, we knew they would always be OK.

Is your child

a bookworm?

a dreamer?

a clown?

a builder?

Hug them, tell them how amazing they are!!! Celebrate them for exactly how they have been designed. Encourage them to do the job that they enjoy!

Redeemed from my hurt

Meaning: to make up for; to obtain the restoration of, as from captivity, by paying a ransom.

There is no greater joy than to be given a tangible answer to a deep hurt. (Read here for the source of the pain). Although, I felt I had overcome the trial, I began having night terrors about the problem again. Several nights in a row, I’d wake with the stabbing thoughts in my head.

I would say the name of Jesus.  “Jesus. Jesus.”  No long prayer, no fretting about it. I would quietly say “Jesus”. And I would fall back to sleep.

I told my husband about the restless nights. I told him that I felt rejected still.     Forgotten.                                                                                                                                                That spirit has a nasty way of sneaking up on you, and trying to steal something. Like a thief in the night…….

Thankfully since moving two hours away, I can communicate with friends through social media, phone calls, and text.                                                                                                          Yet, I was desiring and praying for a God fearing friend here. A sister to build me up, pray with me, and hold me accountable. A friend who would know scripture and show me in His Word the Truth. A friend, locally, that would hold my hand and lift up praises and burdens to our Savior, Jesus.

I’ve waited, and prayed, and waited, and prayed……………

Yesterday, God delivered an answered prayer. A new friend who is so similar to me, it’s like our personalities are parallel. We had lunch that turned into five hours of testimony, tears, and prayers.

Today, I sat doing my devotions, and I landed on REDEEMED. In that moment, I understood how my God loves me, He hears my pain, and when we go to Him, He redeems it in ways unimaginable.

 

O Israel, hope in the Lord;
for with the Lord there is unfailing love.
His redemption overflows.

Psalm 130:7 NLT

And as I felt the redemption overflow, I cried tears for His unfailing love.

Has the Lord redeemed you? Then speak out!
    Tell others he has redeemed you from your enemies.

Psalm 107:2 NLT

I am speaking out! I am shouting out!                                                                                          For the One Who hears me in the dark of night.                                                                             For the One Who sees the pain in my heart.                                                                               For the One Who knows what is best for me.

There will be a highway
called the Holy Road.
No one rude or rebellious
is permitted on this road.
It’s for God’s people exclusively—
impossible to get lost on this road.
Not even fools can get lost on it.
No lions on this road,
no dangerous wild animals—
Nothing and no one dangerous or threatening.
Only the redeemed will walk on it.
The people God has ransomed
will come back on this road.
They’ll sing as they make their way home to Zion,
unfading halos of joy encircling their heads,
Welcomed home with gifts of joy and gladness
as all sorrows and sighs scurry into the night.

Isaiah 35:8-11 MSG

My enemies will not walk beside me. They will not cause me troubles in my sleep.

REDEEMED synonyms: RESCUE, RESTORE, REMODEL

My Jesus has rescued me! He is restoring in me a new faith, a renewed understanding!!

In all their affliction He was afflicted,
And the Angel of His Presence saved them;
In His love and in His pity He redeemed them;
And He bore them and carried them
All the days of old.

Isaiah 63:9 NKJV

He is remodeling my renewed understanding of His redemption. Same redemption, now with a tangible face!! Just as Isaiah 35:9 said, I am feeling the unfading halo of joy encircling my head. Hallelujah!

The antonym for REDEEMED is abandon.                                                                                   HA! I laugh at that! The enemy tries to appear like the truth. He kept me awake in my sleep, telling me ‘You are rejected. They don’t like you. You are completely alone.’ The enemies tactics are twisted and complete opposite of God’s Word.

OH NO enemy! The Word of God says

I will never fail you, never abandon you

Hebrews 13:5 NLT

To be abandoned is a lie straight from the devil.

 

Redemption (the action of redeem) has origin from the word redimere or red + emere. I will break it down this way-

• Emere is to take, buy, gain, exempt, release
• Red is like the blood of Jesus.

With his own blood—not the blood of goats and calves—he entered the Most Holy Place once for all time and secured our redemption forever.

Hebrews 9:12

The enemy wanted to tell me ‘You are rejected’.

The blood of Jesus reminds me I AM REDEEMED.

A new friendship, given in answered prayer, will restore me!  My mind is remodeled with the complete understanding of God’s faithfulness.

Tangible redemption.

I will follow His path.

(Let me pray for you if you are hurting or need to be restored. I offer this because someone prayed for me. And I want to continue that redemption.)